Are You More Loving?

In our Wednesday evening Bible study for this summer we are using Don Whitney’s book, “Ten Questions to Diagnose Your Spiritual Health.” It is the occasion for a probing look at the state of our spiritual health. The writer of Hebrews calls Christians to “press on to maturity.” Whitney’s book is a very helpful tool toward achieving this goal.

Our study this past Wednesday focused on the question, “Are you more loving?” Love is the clearest mark of the Christian. Jesus said “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (Jn. 13:34, 35). If we are growing Christian, we will be growing in our love for others. “Love is the badge and character of Christianity.”

What does the decline of love in the Christian’s life look like? It is possible to regress in our Christian walk and look more unlike Jesus. It is not supposed to be this way, but it happens. Jesus rebuked the church in Ephesus for having left its first love. Losing patience more easily, increasing unkindness, becoming less courteous (especially to those closest to us), becoming more easily angered, unconcern for the lost, and not giving ourselves to hospitality are some of the ways a decline in love would manifest itself. When a diagnosis reveals a spiritual problem, we must take action. At the same time it is to be remembered, in the words of author Maurice Roberts, “The best believers find their progress slow and their attainments meager.” The direction of our growth is what is most important, not the speed.

What are some of the counterfeit loves that exist? It is possible to think we are growing in love when the truth is we have bought into some deceptive substitutes. Many congratulate themselves for what amounts to what it means to be merely human. It is generally true that human beings will have special feelings for family members (Rom. 1:31; 2 Tim. 3:3). Christian love is more than this. “I’ll love you if you love me.” As Whitney says, “this is the epitome of worldly love.” A relationship that works on the principle of “I will scratch your back, if you will scratch mine” is not what Jesus had in mind when He commanded us to love one another.

In which areas will growing love demonstrate itself? Love for other Christians will be strengthened (1 Jn. 3:14 “We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love the brethren.”). How are your relationships? Are the needs of fellow believers on your radar screen? A growing love means love for the lost. Jesus loved the young man who had made material things his god (Mk. 10:21). The unsaved do not need us as their judge (that’s God’s business). They need those who genuinely care for their eternal well-being. Within one’s family is also a place where growing love will be seen; more gratitude shown, less anger, more physical affection, more patience, responsibility, generosity, frugality, or simply having more time for them.

How can genuine, Christlike love be cultivated? Whitney suggests six ways. Meditate on love as the most important distinguishing mark of a Christian (Love is truth in action). Let your heart be often warmed by the fire of God’s love. Daily communion with God in His Word and prayer will stoke the fires of growing love. Discover assurance that God is your Father by loving as He loves (“Everyone who loves is born of God.” 1 Jn. 4:7). Delight in loving God. Whitney reminds us that “love, in it essence, is likeness to God.” Is this what you want more than anything else in life? Identify those relationships where you most need to grow in love. Is it your family, a rusty relationship, a neighbor, a person at church? And finally, take the initiative in showing love, especially where you have little or no expectation of love in return.

What then can we do? Use the following questions to provoke and probe your mind to grow more in love: What crisis, however small, is taking place in your life? What is the condition of your closest relationship? Have you been hostile lately to someone who has been good to you?

We have seven more studies in “Ten Questions to Diagnose Your Spiritual Health.” Join us on Wednesday evenings as we “interrogate our hearts” in order to press on to spiritual maturity.

Dr. Howard E. Dial

Berachah Bible Church

Father the Leader

Have you ever played follow-the-leader? It was a favorite game in our youth. It is not very complicated. One person leads the way by doing various physical maneuvers such walking on a wall, jumping a creek, leap-frogging over a parking meter, running backwards without falling, eating an unripe persimmon without wincing, those sorts of things. The others were to mimic the action. The intent was for the leader to try to get everyone to drop out. He would then be the winner.

Leadership, however, is not simply being able to do difficult things which others cannot. There is no shortage of books written on what leadership is and how to lead. This is especially true within the evangelical Christian community. Most of these books are written by Christians who have had some measure of success in pastoring a church, starting a Christian organization, or having written other books that have sold well. Valuable instruction can be found in such writings. Father’s Day is a good time to revisit the matter of leadership. Fathers are to be leaders. But what does leadership look like in a family?

Some fathers lead by not leading. They are in the home physically but are passive regarding biblical priorities. This kind of leadership is primarily occupied with the desire for peace and quiet in the home. Other fathers think leadership is something like the military. It is command and control. Do what father says. Any deviance from this standard and wife and children will have to answer to the captain of the ship, i.e. Dad. These methods of leadership have been stated in the extreme, but they do represent too many “Christian” homes. Fathers will have different leadership styles. However, there are fundamental biblical truths that must be believed and acted upon if the family is to be led in the right direction.

Family leadership begins with the father’s submission to the sovereign Head of the Church, the Lord Jesus Christ. It is the relinquishing of all rights to the One who has provided redemption and makes freedom to serve Him possible. This truth is developed in Scriptural texts such as 1 Corinthians 11:2-7 and Ephesians 5:23-33. Fathers do not possess authority independent of what has been delegated to them by God. Fathers, are you taking your orders from Jesus Christ and following His lead?

Family leadership demands that a father adopt the attitude of a servant. The Head of every Christian man, Jesus Christ, said that “whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your servant” (Matt. 20:26). Christ-exalting leadership is the possession of a servant’s heart (Eph. 4:2). Fathers, is that you? Are you focused on God and others rather than self?

Family leadership necessitates a sense of direction. A father must know where he is going and how to get there. Like Abraham of old, Christian fathers are pilgrims who are “looking for the city which has foundations, whose architect and builder is God” (Heb. 11: 10). Fathers, Christ’s coming kingdom and God’s eternal presence is our destination. Are we living and leading like this is true? What do our children think of us when all they know about us is that the love of money and material things dominates our lives?

Family leadership requires a love of the kind which Jesus Christ has for His Church (Eph. 5:25). If we fathers are one with Christ, then others will know this is true by the way we love. We need more fathers who lead by sacrificial, self-denying, cross-bearing, other-serving love. There is no greater gift from a father to his children than for them to see him dying daily for their mother.

Family leadership calls for a desire for unity in the home. Fathers, how important are unity, acceptance of diversity, harmony, and companionship to us in our homes? Conformity is not unity. We can demand that everyone fit into our plans but that is not unity. Unity is the experience of the bond we have in Christ in an atmosphere of truth and love. No two children are alike. We need to know our children. Love their differences. Discipline and train them accordingly. Are arguments, criticism, and name-calling methods of communication in your home? In our disagreements let us replace harshness with the law of kindness. May the flag of biblical unity fly over our homes (Eph. 4:3).

Family leadership bears the trademark of forgiveness. A father who belongs to Jesus Christ will show the way by delighting in the enormity of the forgiveness he has received from God in Christ. This sense of the magnitude of God’s forgiveness will be lived out in a father’s forgiveness of others (Matt. 18:21-35). Grudges, resentment, bitterness, and a pay-back attitude betray the freedom of forgiveness that should characterize a home environment. Fathers, are you a repenting and forgiving leader?

Family leadership means being sensitive to the hurts and problems of one’s family. Fathers who lead God’s way work at staying alert to the dangers that go with living in a world in rebellion against God and hostile to the Christian faith. Fathers, every member of our families has to do battle with the world, the flesh, and the devil. Do you know some of the struggles taking place around you? Why has your teenage son suddenly grown sullen and withdrawn? Have you noticed that your teenage daughter is eating very little and doesn’t think she is thin enough? Leaders must be observant and discerning as they keep a wary eye on the enemy, our adversary, who “prowls about like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Pet. 5:8).

Family leadership means assuming the responsibility of praying for every family member every day. All believers are admonished to pray without ceasing (1 Thess. 5:17). Fathers, prayer is an expression of our dependence on God. Do you wonder how your children are going to turn out? Do you think about some of the “what-ifs” of various family members? Worry and anxiety are to be replaced with fervent prayer for our wives, sons, and daughters (Phil. 4:6). A father who leads is one who takes the time to intercede for those placed in his charge. It is a form of protection, a base-line duty of a husband and father, to go before God daily as a spiritual warrior mindful of Satan’s schemes (Eph. 6:11, 18). Fathers, did you rise early this morning to seek the face of God for your family?

Fathers, God’s leaders are made, not born. Actually, the truth is that leadership begins with being born again. It is then that leadership is to develop. A God-pleasing leader is one who is in hot pursuit of God, yearns for His blessing, reads his Bible, is meaningfully involved in his church, and by his example demonstrates what it means to be Christ’s man. That is a leader worth following.

Dr. Howard E. Dial
Berachah Bible Church

Memorial Day 2009

The United States is a peculiar nation in the history of the world. It has been blessed with freedom and opportunity in a way that no other nation has ever been. Citizens of the U.S. are politically, religiously and economically liberated. These reasons provide incentive for many who choose to emigrate here. As a member of the U.S. military, I had the opportunity to spend time in the Republic of South Korea. While that country is free in all the same respects as the U.S., there are still many Korean residents who dream of leaving their home and settling here in this land of unique prospects. Koreans are not alone in this dream. To become an American is, even today, the desire of many foreign citizens.

God has chosen to bless this nation uniquely. He has chosen to keep it uniquely blessed, at least in part, with a strong military. In a fallen world, war is a fact of life. Peace is maintained through strength. The armed forces of this nation first made a name for themselves by defeating the greatest military power in the world at the time in its successful efforts to separate from Mother England. No other nation has subdued this nation since. It remains as independent as it ever was following Lord Cornwallis’ surrender. God, using armed conflict, technology and various other means, has seen fit to allow such freedom.

One of the names by which Israel knew God was “Lord of Hosts.” The word translated “hosts” means “armies” or “divisions,” carrying with it more than a hint of militarism. The phrase “Lord of Hosts” is not limited in scope to the battlefield, as it also points to God’s sovereignty over all forces and entities in the universe which he formed and maintains. It does, however, remind us that though war is chaotic and hazy for its participants, God sees clearly through the fog of battle and determines who will stand and who will fall. David, even as a young man, knew of God’s rule in the midst of skirmishes, declaring to Goliath just before he launched the smooth stone that would fell him,

“45 You come to me with a sword and with a spear and with a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. 46 This day the LORD will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down and cut off your head. And I will give the dead bodies of the host of the Philistines this day to the birds of the air and to the wild beasts of the earth, that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel, 47 and that all this assembly may know that the LORD saves not with sword and spear. For the battle is the LORD's, and he will give you into our hand.” (1 Samuel 17:45-47)

The warrior that fights and wins fights and wins because God has decreed victory. The combatant that falls falls at God’s discretion. Goliath was undoubtedly the more skilled and seasoned soldier that day in the Valley of Elah, but God favored the Israeli shepherd boy. The colonial army in 1783 was, in the minds of many, no match for King George III’s Redcoats. The British went down to defeat nonetheless.

God presides over hostilities on the battlefield, but his supervision and intervention don’t make war a neat and tidy affair. Even decisive and glorious victories produce death and dismemberment for the victors, much more the vanquished. The ventures of the United States into armed conflict are no exceptions. Since 1776, the Army, Navy, Air Force and Marine Corps of the U.S. have engaged in 15 major conflicts producing more than 650,000 casualties, including casualties in the ongoing War on Terror.

Tomorrow, our nation will officially recognize Memorial Day, a day of remembrance of those who have given their lives in defense of this nation. As we pause to recall the sacrifices made on our behalf by our soldiers, sailors, airmen and Marines, let us be thankful to God and to those who died for what they have done for us. Let us also remember that God was no detached observer in those moments of death. He guided bullets and blocked bayonets, shielding some and exposing others. Even sacrifice of one’s life can only occur because God has granted that life in the first place. This fact does not diminish the sacrifice made by those who died in defense of our nation. It only serves as a reminder that man, even in his noblest and most selfless moments, still owes his very being to his Creator.

God is the Lord of Armies. Life and death, victory and failure, war and peace are governed by his sovereign hand. As David declared, the battle, indeed, is the Lord’s.

Steve Pizzini
Berachah Bible Church

The Making of A Mother

Are mothers born or made? In some sense mothers are born. God has created women to bear children with the included necessary psychological and emotional “wiring” to nurture and rear children. This of course does not mean that all women will be mothers or that all mothers will be good mothers. Nature alone is not enough to endow a female who bears children with the qualities needed for effective motherhood. Other things must be in place to ensure godly mothering. No greater privilege is bestowed upon a human being than the opportunity to give birth to an immortal soul and influence that child with biblical truth. More specifically, to be able to teach one’s child about God, impart divine wisdom, and exemplify Christ-exalting living is quintessential mothering.

How then can a mother be made to fulfill such a noble task as godly mothering? A godly mother must be conceived in the womb of the new birth. The one who is to conceive life within her must be born of the Spirit of God. This new birth that comes from God is not the result of human effort but is the product of the Holy Spirit. Motherhood without God is possible but is not good. There is too much at stake. The brush with death in giving birth, time and energy given on behalf of others, and mothering a future generation is without eternal value if Christ is shunned.

A godly mother is made by a mother who is godly. The best start in life is one that grows and develops under the watchful loving eyes of a mother who knows God and passes on His truth in the Bible to her children. Were you brought up by a mother who loved Christ and who taught you the Scriptures from infancy? If so, rejoice and aspire to do the same for your children. This kind of intergenerational spiritual linkage bears consequences for thousands of generations (Ex. 20:6). A godly mother is also made by having a father who knows his heavenly Father. Fathers, do you have a daughter? Meg Meeker in her book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters has said that “daughters who spend more time with their fathers are less likely to drink, take drugs, have sex as teenagers or have out-of-wedlock babies.” Yes fathers, your time with your daughter matters greatly both in its quantity and quality. Daughters need dads who live for Christ.

A godly mother is made by being around older women who are devoting their remaining years to the display of inner beauty (1 Pet. 3:4; Tit. 2:3). Older women in the church who embrace life as an opportunity for sacred service to God, who use their tongues for encouragement rather than injuring others, who do not allow chemical dependencies to become a substitute for dependence on God, and who are committed to passing on the truth of God as it has been woven into the years of their experience are a rich treasure for mothers to be and mothers in the making. The work of a mother is not finished when the nest is empty. There are younger women who desperately need older women to whom they can look and see how to live God’s way.

A godly mother is made by knowing older men who are blazing a trail that is worth following (Tit. 2:2). Older men who are clear and discerning in their thinking, worthy of respect, self-controlled, rock-solid in their faith, who know how to love and to live with their hope set on heaven can make an incalculable contribution to the way mothers-to-be think about manhood. A mother in training needs an example of what true masculinity is like for it may be part of her task to rear a son for God.

A godly mother is made by learning early in life the value of displaying the precious jewelry of Christian truth (Tit. 2:4-5). The church working in concert with the family has a great work to do. Young women have to be taught how to express love to their husbands and children. As has already been pointed out, older women in the congregation must rise to the occasion and offer guidance in how to be committed to the spiritual welfare of one’s husband, in showing interest in what he does, and how to be his helper. Infants and small children are cute. But with that established there is a lot of love-work that has to be done. Children are self-centered and if left to themselves will bring heartache to their parents. They have to be taught what love is, how to get along with others, the importance of self-control, respect for authority, knowledge of the Scriptures, and how to make decisions. The mother who wants to be a God-pleaser needs guidance in how to lay out life’s priorities, in not being ruled by emotions, and how to develop a theological mind. It is this kind of jewelry that is to adorn the mother after God’s own heart.

A godly mother is made by understanding that outer beauty without inner beauty is a monstrosity (Prov. 11:22 “As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a beautiful woman who lacks discretion.”). The world brings great pressure to bear on young girls. It would have them believe that facial cream, make-up, clothes, a model-like figure, and beauty to die for are what define femininity. Let the man beware who wants a godly mother for his children. The man is caught by looking at the gold ring and failing to see the pig. What is the pig? It is that women who is morally flawed and relationally defective. The young girl who wants to grow up and have children of her own would do well to live by the truth that beauty is only skin deep. What really matters is having a heart that radiates love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Now that would be a mother that would make any son or daughter proud.

A godly mother is made by being savvy as to the degree of moral corruption that exists in society. To be spiritually ditsy is no laughing matter. The mothers of tomorrow need a Christian world and life view that makes them able to see through the smoke and mirrors of modern thinking. Multi-culturalism, the internet, the theory of evolution, and a host of other concepts and issues require a biblically razor sharp mind. A godly mother is made by refusing to be a self-satisfied woman, but instead has an insatiable appetite for God and His Word. In an age where the god narcissism rules (having a love-affair with oneself), a mother who is running hard after God will not preen herself on the latest fashions, hair-styles, or linger long in front of the mirror. She does not neglect her appearance and health, but her primary concern is to know the Scriptures and how they apply to her life.

A godly mother is made as she prays for, respects, and is devoted to her husband. She will not grow weary in the well-doing of submitting to her husband in the Lord and delights in the opportunity to exemplify the way Christ’s church submits to Him. By doing this she lives out gospel truth and gives her children an everlasting portrait of God’s redemption in Christ. A godly mother is made by valuing her children as gifts from God. She views them as made in the image of God, but because of sin are in need of God’s forgiveness. The early morning finds her in faithful intercession before God for those for whom she is responsible.

A godly mother is made by becoming an authentic worshiper of God. Her children must see her standing along side other believers in Christ singing the songs that extol God and the wonders of His salvation. A confusing message is sent to sons and daughters when their mother would rather stay at home and watch television than giving herself in ministry and encouragement to others on the Lord’s Day. But her worship doesn’t begin and end on Sunday. The whole of her life is a praise response to God’s mercy and grace to her. Her worship of God on the first day of the week is matched by her kindness on Tuesday.

Is it your desire young women to be a mother one day? Do you know what it takes to be a godly mother? Now is the time to set out on that journey. It will not be easy, but it will yield heavenly rewards that will echo throughout eternity. This would be a good time for all mothers in the making to renew their heart’s desire to exalt Christ. “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised” (Prov 31:30).

Dr. Howard E. Dial
Berachah Bible Church

The Swine Flu and Other Plagues

“Swine flu outbreak in 11 states; 1 dead.” The headlines of this week’s AJC placed everyone on alert. Some may even be in a mild state of panic. The World Health Organization and the Center for Disease Control have been communicating with the public in terms of the possibility of an epidemic or a pandemic. Either way, it is a serious matter in this day of rapid international travel. A flu carrier can be in Mexico in the morning and at his home in America or elsewhere by the afternoon. Many remember the SARS scare of 2003 (severe acute respiratory syndrome) when the world community scrambled to contain what seemed to be a deadly viral threat to millions of people. In the 1300’s the “black death” (the bubonic plague) swept through Europe destroying a fourth of its population. If you visit cemeteries in our own locale, you will notice how many died in the winter of 1918, at the height of World War I, from a lethal influenza virus that raced around the world. It is estimated that as many as 100 million people died worldwide from that great influenza outbreak.

The Bible gives us brief pictures of epidemics of sickness and death that have played a role in the story of redemption. The ten plagues of Egypt come to mind (Ex. 7-10). The tenth and final plague was the death of the first-born in every family that was not protected by the blood of a slain lamb on the doorposts and lintel of every house. We are not told how God’s death angel administered such a sorrowful epidemic of death. But it was enough to dislodge Pharaoh from his refusal to let Israel go from his land. Whatever the disease was that killed so many, it was God’s judgment on a truth-resistant Pharaoh and deliverance for Israel.

In a case of passing a hot potato, the ark of God inflicted a fatal disease on every Philistine who welcomed it into their community (1 Sam. 4-5). After about seven months of this the Philistines had had enough and worked out an arrangement to send the ark back to its rightful owners, God’s covenant people. The idol worshiping Philistines even tried some “sympathetic magic” as a means of alleviating their misery (1 Sam. 6:4-5). They thought that they could remove the disaster that plagued them by using models (five golden rats and five golden swollen lymph nodes). To show that God does not play favorites, over 50,000 Beth-shemesh citizens succumbed to the same disease that had afflicted the Philistines when some Israelites disrespectfully looked into the ark of the Lord (1 Sam . 6:19).

In what was one of the low points in King David’s life, he brought a plague upon Israel through his disobedience to God (2 Sam. 24:10-25). David violated one of God’s commands to Israel’s kings by pridefully having Israel’s number of fighting men counted. This ego trip resulted in God sending a deadly epidemic that took the lives of seventy thousand men. The attempt to organize his kingdom more perfectly like the self-promoting monarchs of surrounding nations brought about thousands of grieving widows. David, as God’s surrogate in Israel, learned the hard way that glorying in numbers was contrary to trusting in God for defensive power against all enemies.

The present world population of over six billion makes the prophecy of the pale horse in Revelation 6:7-8 absolutely staggering. A pandemic will contribute to the death of a fourth of the earth’s inhabitants in the Great Tribulation. Mankind’s hopes for creating lasting peace, plenty, and longevity of life through global politics, environmentalism, and scientific advances will meet with great disappointment. The great day of the wrath of the Lamb will make use of viral and bacterial diseases that will defy human invention and take, at present calculations, over two billion lives.

The swine flu along with every germ and disease known and unknown to man is part of the curse of death. Sin is the mother of death. Microorganisms that cause disease stand as a witness to a creation that groans under the curse of sin. It is sin that fallen human beings refuse to acknowledge as the real villain of human existence. It is sin that has corrupted every one of us and alienates us from our holy Creator. It is sin that ruins our relationships, breaks up our homes, deceives us, and hurls us into eternal judgment. Men and women may deny they are sinners but they can’t play like death isn’t there. That is what is so terrifying about the possibility of a mutated flu virus that could kill people by the millions. The grim reaper cannot be denied. The fear of death creates as many explanations for death as there are spiritually dead people. Sin’s grip must be broken if Satan’s (the father of death) grip is to be broken (Heb. 2:14; Eph. 2:1-5). Where is this liberation that we so desperately need? Freedom from the fear of death comes in liberation from the guilt of sin. Our liability to God’s wrath because of our rebellion against Him must be brought to the foot of the cross and the empty tomb of Jesus. Those who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ for their salvation from God’s condemnation are the only ones who can be free from the fear of death.

Those who have experienced the transforming power of the gospel of Jesus Christ should not be people who are infected with the fear of death. Those who belong to Christ know that death belongs to them (1 Cor. 3:22). It takes every believer to their everlasting rest in heaven. Christians are, therefore, able to show mercy to those who are afflicted with the diseases of our mortality. It is a ministry of witness to the hope that is in Christ. The swine flu and every germ on our planet tell us that death is the penalty of sin. The mother of all plagues is the plague of sin. But the greater news is that the Gospel proclaims the death of death in the death of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Dr. Howard E. Dial
Berachah Bible Church

Myths about Marriage and Family

A myth is an invented story in an attempt to explain something in life or nature. Romulus and Remus were mythical founders of Rome. It was said that a wolf nursed the twins after they had been abandoned as babies. We are amused by such myths. But myths are no laughing matter when they are accepted as truth. There are myths about marriage and family. The tragedy is that these myths are believed and acted upon by many to their own harm and loss. The following are some of myths that rule the thoughts of men and women regarding marriage and family.

Myth # 1 – Marriage is a 50/50 proposition. This myth says that in order for a marriage to work right a husband and wife must meet half way. As each fulfills his or her own responsibilities marriage will be what it ought to be. What’s wrong here? The truth is that marriage is a 100/100 effort. Each spouse is to give a 100 % commitment to the other. There is no meeting at the middle and waiting for the other to do their part. God holds the husband accountable to love Him with all his heart, soul, mind, and strength and to love his wife as he loves himself. The same is true for the wife. Are you fully committed to your marriage? Or are you standing there tapping your feet thinking you have done your part waiting on your spouse to give equal effort?

Myth # 2 – The basis of marriage is love. This myth has an element of truth in it, namely, that love is a vital component in a good marriage. But the fact is that the basis of marriage is the covenant that binds a man and a woman together. Vows were taken in the marriage ceremony. Promises were exchanged. A commitment was forged. If one doesn’t love his or her spouse any longer, then they must learn to love. A lack of love is no excuse for running away from marital promises. Love can and should be learned. On the surface of it that may sound cold and hard. But it isn’t when it becomes understood that love is not merely an emotion. It is a way of thinking and acting. When love comes up out of the heart and makes sacrifices for the good of the other person, emotion will follow. Romance reenters a marriage when two people give themselves to love God’s way (1 Cor. 13:4-7).

Myth # 3 – The goal of marriage is happiness. This is not true. The goal of marriage is to glorify the Lord (1 Cor. 10:31). A man may say that his wife is difficult to live with (and it may be true). He says, “She makes me unhappy.” So he concludes there is no hope for the marriage, which further confuses matters. If a husband or wife just wants to be happy, then they will try to use God and talk in terms of having one’s needs met (another myth). An entirely different outlook is necessary to counteract the myth of “God wants me to be happy and you are not meeting my needs.” God is not against our personal happiness. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit. The joy of the Lord is to be the Christian’s strength. A self-serving person thinks only about his own happiness. The one who serves God obeys Him and experiences a delight that overflows its banks. The driving passion of one’s heart ought to be to display the perfections of God no matter what the circumstances, yes, even if one’s spouse is making life hard.

Myth # 4 – Having children will draw a husband and wife closer together. If a couple is living life God’s way children can bring added blessing and unity. But having children is no guarantee that a marital relationship will get better. Sometimes a wife will think that she will be happier if she could have a baby. Mixed in with this desire may also be the thinking that a child will create some longed for happiness. The reality is that children bring added pressure. A new addition to the family cannot remove bitterness. Actually, children will tend to magnify the problems that already exist in a marriage. Children are a gift from God and should be enjoyed (Psa. 127), but they will not make pre-existing attitudes and behavior suddenly vanish. It is the empowering work of the Holy Spirit in one’s life that changes a relationship, not the multiplication of children.

Myth # 5 – It is better to be married than single. Self-deception is a tricky thing. We can convince ourselves that something will be true if only our circumstances would change. The single person who is lonely and unhappy can believe that being married will make life “all better.” It is an easy trap to fall into. Looking around in a church filled with married couples the single may surmise that they are all happy. Churches can be guilty of exacerbating the problem of single discontent through preaching and body-life that holds up marriage as a goal to be pursued by all, looking with suspicion upon those who are choosing to remain single, and by creating a social culture that marginalizes single people. Nevertheless, singles must think biblically about their circumstances. Read what the apostle Paul says about the advantages of serving God as a single (1 Cor. 7:25-40). Happiness is not created by circumstances. It comes to those who are walking by the Spirit.

Myth # 6 – Our children will grow up to be fine Christians and upstanding citizens, if we do the right things. We must be careful in dismantling this myth. On the one hand it is important that one’s children be brought up “in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:1). But at the same time biblical wisdom tells us that godly diligence in child-rearing does not guarantee the moral and spiritual outcome of one’s children. The examples of godly fathers who produced ungodly sons are abundant in the Old Testament. The supreme case of a “wounded parent” is found in God’s relationship with Israel (Hos. 11:1-4). Israel’s rejection of God’s love is notorious in the annals of redemptive history. The proper response to the myths that surround child training is not to be one of cynicism and fear. Instead parents are to be faithful in instructing their child in the whole counsel of God, providing abundant opportunities for learning how to live life God’s way, and giving an example of what it means to be a God-pleaser. All this is to be seasoned with prayer and dependence on God.

These are not all of the myths attached to marriage and the family. But they are enough to alert us to the dangers that beset us in living in a world that treats the Bible carelessly. Living in the fast lane with brief or no encounters with what the Bible teaches is the soil in which myths germinate. Myths are best identified and rejected “by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect” (Rom. 12:2).

Dr. Howard E. Dial
Berachah Bible Church

The Resurrection of Jesus Christ: Some Questions

Why is the resurrection of Jesus Christ so important to Christianity? The resurrection is one of the foundational truths of the gospel message upon which Christianity rests (1 Cor. 15:1-11, 17-18). It is the foundation stone of orthodox Christianity and without it there is no Christian faith. According to the apostle Paul, if there is no resurrection the apostles were liars, the Christian’s faith is worthless, there is no hope for the future, and the world is right and we (Christians) are wrong (1 Cor. 15:15-19).

Can a person be saved and not believe in the resurrection of Christ from the dead? No! The resurrection of Jesus is essential to salvation (Rom. 10:9-10). There is no good news without a resurrected Savior (1 Cor. 15:12-14). The object of the gospel would be a dead man. The good news would be bad news. We are left with theological fiction.

Was the resurrection of Jesus Christ important in the church of the first century? Absolutely. It was necessary to have seen the resurrected Christ if one was to be an apostle (Acts 1:21-22). The resurrection was the main topic of the sermons preached in the early church (Acts 2:24, 32; 3:15, 26; 4:10; 10:40; 13:30-37; 17:31). Actually, the theme of the first messages recorded in the Book of Acts runs something like this: “This Jesus that you crucified and put to death was raised up by God.” The truth was clearly and boldly presented; the crucifixion was no accident. God planned it. Sinful men executed it. The resurrection of Jesus confirmed that He was the Messiah and Lord (Acts 2:22-32).

Was the resurrection of Jesus Christ prophesied in the Old Testament? It most certainly was. Peter used Psalm 16:8-11 and Psalm 110:1 to demonstrate that David could not be speaking of himself. He was speaking of the resurrection and ascension of the Messiah (Acts 2:25-31). In Psalm 2:7 it is prophesied that the identity of Jesus would be demonstrated in His resurrection. The prophet Isaiah said that the coming Messiah would have His days “prolonged” (Isa. 53:10). Having made an offering of Himself for sin and then to have His days prolonged necessitates bodily resurrection.

Did Jesus say anything about His resurrection from the dead? He did. He predicted it (Jn. 2:18-22; 10:18; 11:25; Matt. 12:38-40; 20:19; Mk. 8:31; Lk. 18:33, 34). At the very beginning of His public ministry Jesus told the Jews that He would raise Himself from the dead. Almost three years later in the fall before the spring of His resurrection, Jesus said, “because I lay down My life that I may take it again” (Jn. 10:17). Jesus was not surprised by His own resurrection from the grave. He knew He would come back from the dead to live forevermore. If He was not raised, then He lied. He then would not be the Savior from sin, but a deceiver.

Was the resurrection of Jesus an actual bodily resurrection? Some claim that Jesus’ resurrection body was an immaterial and invisible body. This represents a failure to understand the word “spiritual” in reference to Christ’s post-resurrection body (1 Cor. 15:44). The word “spiritual” means a supernatural body. Jesus actually died. He did not swoon away and revive in the cool tomb. Blood and water flowed from His side (Jn. 19:34, 35). A Roman centurion and other soldiers confirmed His death (M. 15:45; Jn. 19:33). When Jesus came out of the tomb, He came out physically. The tomb was examined. His body was not in it (Jn. 20:5, 7). The resurrected Jesus ate with His disciples (Lk. 24:41-45). The angels said, “He is not here, but He has risen” (Lk. 24:6-8). Christ’s resurrection body could be seen, touched, smelled, and heard. He was no ghost. The material body of Jesus was manifested to His disciples and many others in its glory.

Were there witnesses to Jesus’ resurrection? Yes. There were many (1 Cor. 15:5-11). The threefold criteria for evaluating the trustworthiness of a testimony is: (a) The witness must be competent (“eye-witnesses”), (b) Sufficient in number, and (c) Of a good reputation. The witnesses to the bodily resurrection qualified on all three counts. Some of these were Mark, Matthew, Luke, John, Paul, Peter, James, Jude, Mary Magdalene, and the two disciples on the way to Emmaus (Mk. 16:12, 13). Were they all mistaken? Did they lie? Did they really see a resurrected Jesus? They were all trustworthy witnesses.

What is the relationship between Christ’s resurrection from the dead and the hope for the Christian’s resurrection? The apostle said that Christ is “the first fruits” of those who belong to Him (1 Cor. 15:20-23). This means that because Jesus was resurrected from the dead, so will all believers be raised. Jesus’ defeat of death is the first installment of a harvest of resurrected saints. This is why Paul taught that the denial of a resurrected body is a denial of the reality of Christ’s own bodily resurrection. We who are His will live forever in bodies suited for all eternity, because He lives.

Will there be any similarity between Christ’s resurrected body and the Christian’s resurrected body? Christ’s was recognized by His disciples in His appearances after His resurrection. We will recognize one another. His body could be touched. We will not be mere spirits but touchable, glorious physical bodies. Christ’s resurrection body had the ability to eat, but did not have to. There will be a luscious fruit-bearing tree of life in the heavenly city (Rev. 22:2). It will not be a mere decoration. The resurrected body of Jesus had the same voice resonance (i.e. same system of vocal cords). We will hear and recognize one another’s voices in heaven but without the imperfections that mortality has placed upon us.

What is the relationship between believers being able to stand before God as forgiven and accepted and the resurrection of Christ? Christ was raised in order to accomplish our justification. Justification is that legal act of God in which He declares us to be righteous in His sight. The justified believer can be accepted by God because His sins are forgiven and Christ’s righteousness belongs to him. No one could be justified before God if Jesus had not been raised from the dead (Rom. 4:25). None of us can earn the right to be with God in heaven. Such a privilege is because Jesus earned our justification. The open tomb of Jesus is God’s stamp of approval on the value of Jesus’ death on the cross.

How is the resurrection of Jesus to make a difference in the life of the Christian? It is to make all the difference in the world. The resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead demonstrates the power of God to save us and make us like Jesus Christ. The resurrection is proof of the power for change. It is a power that the believer already possesses in Christ (Eph. 1:20; 2:1, 6). Loving one another is possible. Freedom from the power of sin is possible (Rom. 6:4). Life dominating sins can be cut off at their roots. New desires, new motives, new aspirations, new thought patterns, and zeal for God are all possible because of resurrection power.

Dear friend, do you know the power of the resurrection? Have you experienced the life transforming power of God’s Holy Spirit? You ask, “How can this come about?” The resurrected Christ died to pay the penalty of sin. He was wounded for our transgressions. Because He lives you can enjoy the freedom of forgiveness and eternal life. Call upon the name of the Lord and you will be saved. Let the celebration of Christ’s resurrection be the day when you abandon your futile effort to earn God’s favor and accept the gift of salvation which the resurrected Christ offers so full and free.

Dr. Howard E. Dial
Berachah Bible Church